My Foxie...

Music: “Borrasca”/OL + LN (now playing: “August Moon”)
Mood: tired
In my glass: Italian red (Barbera d’Asti)

I often wonder lately if Fox is happy. He’s sleeping all day. I’m at home but not spending much time with him. I never play with him… R. was the one who played with him. Now, when I’m in the living room, Fox often comes to me and lie down at my feet. When I watch TV, he joins me on the couch. But, you know, I don’t watch TV very often and I’m not in the living room that much.

When he plays with his friends (like Rocky or Reggi or Sita or other dogs he comes across), he runs, jumps and rolls like a 6 month young puppy…. But in fact he’s not. He’s an old chap (he's now 8 and a half... means over 60 of human's age!).
Like peeing blood, having dirty eyes – it’s all something to do with his age.. I think. And today, I saw he was walking a bit strange… as if he had pain somewhere. I checked his paws but didn’t find anything.. no wounds or anything.
He’s a natural born clown and he’s always sweet. I only hope he’s happy but all he gets from me is: “No, Fox!” or “Don’t, Fox!”.. or “Hurry, Fox!” From people who don’t know him, he gets remarks like “oh, what an ugly dog!” or “Oooh, scary!” Fortunately, he doesn’t understand them – he just wags his tail.

My cats are better off, I think. I’m too protective, I know, but they are at least with 2 of them. They have each other.

Wish Fox could talk.

Ha!

Music: Texas Gold
Mood: Trying
In my glass: Italian white

Yes, yes,…. I’m trying not to take everything too heavy.
By the way, I can’t swim – I can’t float. I think it’s because I can’t relax; I just can’t loosen up.

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The song of the day is from my play list “Texas Gold” (by courtesy of Luz). Ha! Heehee… I see it, Luz…

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She Let Herself Go
(George Strait)

He wondered how she’d take it when he said goodbye.
Thought she might do some cryin’: lose some sleep at night.
But he had no idea, when he hit the road,
That without him in her life, she’d let herself go.

Let herself go on a singles cruise,
To Vegas once, then to Honolulu.
Let herself go to New York City:
A week at the Spa; came back knocked-out pretty.
When he said he didn’t love her no more,
She let herself go.

She poured her heart an’ soul into their three-bedroom ranch.
Spent her days raisin’ babies, ironin’ his pants.
Came home one day from the grocery store and found his note,
And without him there to stop her, she let herself go.

Let herself go on her first blind-date:
Had the time of her life with some friends at the lake.
Let herself go, buy a brand new car,
Drove down to the beach he always said was too far.
Sand sure felt good between her toes.

She let herself go on a singles cruise,
To Vegas once, then to Honolulu.
Let herself go to New York City:
A week at the Spa; came back knocked-out pretty.
When he said he didn’t love her no more,
She let herself go.

To Vegas once: Honolulu, New York City.
Came back knocked-out pretty.
….

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(written by Bean Dillon and Kerry Kurt Phil)

Vitamin B

Music: still the same
Mood: #@%&*$@!!(%$)!!!
In my glass: Italian red (Barbera d’Asti)

Am feeling down, blue, quite depressive… frustrated and prickly too. Well, when you are not feeling good, things can – in your eye – only go wrong. You just don’t see the happy side of the story. I’m now very sensitive to the things that normally wouldn’t hurt or irritate much – for instance, what I read in the magazines, people behaving as if the whole world belongs to them (oh, but they are so irritating) or those nasty remarks on Fox. I’m not very rational at the moment. I feel tired too… it’s strange because I’m doing nothing. I took a few vitamin B tablets; hope they help. Actually (here comes my confession) I’ve been craving chicken!! Is chicken rich in vitamin B? I know pork is.. but don’t know about chicken.

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There was a poem written by a girl in the TV guide. I wonder, btw, why I keep the subscription; I merely watch TV. Anyway, the poem was about how she hated the summer vacation. I can relate. I mean, vacation is nice when you have a real vacation. It seems that she doesn’t. She has time to have a vacation but no opportunity to it – at least, that’s my impression. It’s about the same with me. I know, though, that in my case it’s my own fault (hm… for a half then) that I’m not really enjoying it.

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A neighbour recommended me a film: “As it is in Heaven”. I’m going to watch it probably next week.

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Made the tomatoes again. I finished the first batch in 2+ days. It’s pity I can’t send them over to you, friends, by post. Well, probably a relief for you because you’d be otherwise “bombed” with my tomatoes!

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Hmm… no happy news.

Whistle-whistle...

Music: “World” by Bee Gees
Mood: “World”
In my glass: “World” (…I wish I could drink up the world!)

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Tomatoes were inexpensive this week. I made the semi-dried (in the oven) tomatoes again. It’s actually the first time this year. Oh, they are soooooo YUMMY! The problem is that I can’t stop eating them.

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I haven’t been much on computer lately – even not on Flickr very often. I wonder what I’m doing then instead.. Hhmmm… not much.

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Pirates of the Caribbean (the Curse of the Black Pearl) was on TV tonight. Ha! What a good timing!! Hehehee.. I could fresh up my memories a bit as I’m going to see the part II (Dead Man’s Chest) tomorrow.

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*Whistle-whistle*
It’s time to turn in…

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World
(Bee Gees)

Now I found
That the world is round
And of course it rains everyday.

Living tomorrow, where in the world will I be tomorrow?
How far am I able to see?
Or am I needed here?

Now I found
That the world is round
And of course it rains everyday.

If I remember all of the things I have done,
I’d remember all of the times I’ve gone wrong.
Why do they keep me here?

Now I found
That the world is round
And of course it rains everyday.

And now I found
That the world is round
And of course it rains everyday…

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(written by B., M. & R. Gibb)

Tick-tack...

Music: still the same (right now the acoustic version of “River of Pain” by Thunder)
Mood: --
In my glass: nothing. Had beer tonight.. I wonder if I should open a bottle of wine…

Am through with the book “Als ik bij je ben” (original title in Norwegian is “Når jeg er hos deg” = “When I’m with you”, the English title is “Stella Descending”) by Linn Ullmann. I first started reading this book in April when I was in Seattle. At that time I read only a few pages. When I came home I wanted to finish “Harry Potter” first and I put this book aside for a while.
It’s a bit “strange” story – but I liked it very much. It’s like a puzzle. All the people who are supposed to be talking about Stella, are actually talking about themselves. Some – many phrases are repeated, so are some scenes. And… there’s no beginning and no ending either. That’s what I thought when finished the book.

Linn Ullman is, btw, the daughter of Liv Ullman and Ingmar Bergman. Aha! …I didn’t know that till I googled her to make a link on this page.



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It feels as if my time has stopped while the whole world is still moving forwards. Um, no, my time has not stopped – it’s still ticking without going forth. I can’t go any further, I can’t go backwards, either.. But the world keeps turning, it doesn’t wait for me.

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Mother called me a couple of weeks ago. This time we had no quarrel – phew! It was very late at night for her and I thought – felt – she needed someone to talk to.

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Bought a new sewing machine! Yay!! Well, but… maybe I shouldn’t have, considering my financial situation at the moment. Hhhmm…

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I think I go to bed soon – no wine tonight.

Imagine...

Music: Still the same
Mood: Restless and uneasy
In my glass: Nero d’Avola Sicilia

Read in the paper last week (I think) that a Christian school (or church… I don’t remember exactly) had forbidden the students (or the members) to sing John Lennon’s “Imagine” because of the line “Imagine there’s (…) no religion (…)”. Because – in their opinion – it “denies” religion. Arrgh!! This song does not deny anything. I don’t remember where it was… if it was a school (or church) in NL or the USA… I do remember that I found it ridiculous. I tried to find that article today; I don’t remember which paper it was so I checked all the papers from the last 10 days but in vain.

SO, here’s me singing for those people who are not allowed to sing this song. (It’s really ridiculous!!)

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From the newspaper today.
3 people started fasting today in Washington DC: one Israeli, one Lebanese and one Palestinian. Ok… I’m not fasting with them (I do support them though!!) but I decided instead not to complain about my minor problems at least for coming 2 weeks. There are people dying because of war, hunger, disaster...

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Imagine

Imagine there’s no heaven
It’s easy if you try
No hell below us
Above us only sky
Imagine all the people
Living for today…

Imagine there’s no countries
It isn’t hard to do
Nothing to kill or die for
And no religion too
Imagine all the people
Live life in peace…

You may say I’m a dreamer
But I’m not the only one
I hope someday you’ll join us
And the world will be as one

Imagine no possessions
I wonder if you can
No need for greed or hunger
A brotherhood of man
Imagine all the people
Sharing all the world…

You may say I’m a dreamer
But I’m not the only one
I hope someday you’ll join us
And the world will live as one

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(written by John Lennon)

Plans

Music: “Texas Gold” (that’s the name I gave to the play list with the CDs from Luz), “From RascalM” (that’s how I call the play list with the music from RascalM), Bright Blue Gorilla, Thunder etc.
Mood: mixed, hanging in there

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Above is what I wrote on the other day, attempting to update my blog. Well, there are some unfinished pages in my Word file and this is one of them. I try today again, this time to post “something” even if it’s a very short note. Well, the music I have now on is still the same so I can just copy the “opening”.

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Finally I have 2 weeks off from now on!! I was really looking forward to it, thinking I’d be so happy and excited… Well, strangely… I’m only pessimistic right now. I have only 2 weeks and those 2 weeks are much, much shorter than I actually want them to be… Besides, I still have to work a bit every day – so it is not really a vacation.

I have plans for coming 2 weeks.. but ….I know things don’t always go as I have planned.. then, what’s the use of making plans??

I have to – oh no, correction: I want to work on my small garden. There’s a big pile of dead bamboo I had cut down weeks ago. Weeds are growing everywhere very hard. I just wonder if 2 weeks are enough to get things done… I doubt.

I want to read books. Usually I’m sick and tired of “reading” after my daily 4 newspapers everyday; I have then no energy and space left in my brain to read a book. Reading those papers is a part of my work and I can’t stop it during my holiday either. Beh!

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Gees.. it’s been more than 8 weeks since my last post!! Pffff… Let me think… Well, tomorrow again.. I should go to bed now ‘cause I have “plans” for tomorrow.

Mmmmmm…..

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Sleep
(Bright Blue Gorilla)

- From “Sister Sarah’s Sky”: Sarah trying to get comfortable

Sleep,
I want to sleep,
Forget the problems,
They will keep,
Let me wander through my hazy dreams,
Endlessly

In the day I have to hook my life,
To a machine of stress and greed and strife
Take the beauty and the truth so fine and bleed it white,

Sleep, I want to sleep
In a pool of soothing liquid peace,
Let the healing waters fill my being endlessly,

In the day I have to hook my life,
To a machine of stress and greed and strife
Take the beauty and the truth so fine and bleed it white,

Sleep,
I want to sleep
Life is better when you’re counting sheep,
No love denied no lies, no tragedy,
Endlessly,
Endlessly,
I want to sleep
I want to sleep….

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(written by Robyn Rosenkrantz & Michael Glover)