The thrill of it all

Music: “The Thrill of It All”/Thunder
Mood: High. Feeling good.
In my glass: about to pour in Montepulciano d’Abruzzo


I had something else in my mind to write about for tonight. But it can wait.

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Breaking up with R. has still been shadowing me. It’s a scab that I scratch again and again till it starts to bleed again. It’s a drag on my shoulder, a ball and chain on my feet. I know it was a good and right decision following my heart. And I’m glad I made that decision. But I can’t deny it’s still following me. It comes back from time to time and then I keep asking to myself all those unanswered questions (though getting less and less, fortunately).
The worst thing is that “the book is not yet closed”. I now really, truly, honestly want it to end. Well, I’m working on it – but not fast enough. I’ve got to speed up a bit.

This song is so true - each line, every single word. It’s exactly, for 200%, how I was feeling at that time.

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The Thrill of It All
(Thunder)

I wish I could find a way to make it right
I wish I could see an end to this fight
Cos all I want is a restful sleep tonight

Maybe we’re both to blame, I don’t know
Or maybe we’re both afraid of letting go
Just like a fire that’s burning low
The flames are dying, and I can really feel the cold

Cos I don’t care who’s wrong or who’s right
I can’t stand another day, I can’t stand another day
All we’re doing is wasting our time, carrying on
When the thrill of it all is gone

I’d rather live all alone than live in hell
Cos it feels like I'm doing time, and this room’s a cell
These four walls, the stories they could tell
But they’re in the past, and we both know it well

Cos I don’t care who’s wrong or who’s right
I can’t stand another day, I can’t stand another day
All we’re doing is wasting our time, carrying on
When the thrill of it all is gone

Cos if you cast your mind back to the way it was before
I couldn’t live without you for a day
And I don’t want to kid myself, the truth is plain to see
It’s time we turned and went our separate ways

I wish I could find a way to make it right
I wish I could see an end to this fight
Why don’t we say our long good-byes
Then walk away, while we still both have our pride

Cos I don’t care who’s wrong or who’s right
I can’t stand another day, I can’t stand another day
All we’re doing is wasting our time, carrying on
When the thrill of it all is gone

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written by Morley/James